I created this blog to address issues that go deep- issues some of us may not be aware of- to help us better understand and love ourselves. That includes controversial issues that no one is willing to talk about or bring up. I cannot tell you what to feel a conviction about, how to live or what to do in your life.. But I can give you some food for thought.
What is Kendra's definition of anti-damage?
If you all remember, back when I started this blog in 2010, I made this little icon describing my definition of anti-damage. I call it a verb because it takes action in order for you to decide to be anti-hair damage. This is sort of a "mission statement"
To refrain from cutting... to refrain from the use of products that destroy hair as in to relax or dye... to refrain from the addition of any kind of fake hair, as in weaves, wigs and extensions... to refreain from adding access heat... to refreain from the use of excess force, pulling or tugging when styling hair... to refrain from purposely pulling out hair stands... to appreciate and celebrate the glory God has given us! I Wear Natural Hair!
*GASP* Hold on Kendra, you think using weaves, wigs and extensions are wrong?
Absolutely. I will tell you why...
From a Spiritual standpoint:
My church is very conservative and I have been taught not to wear weaves, extensions, wigs or artificial hair because the when the bible refers to our hair being a covering, it is referring to the literal hair on our head. I am aware that many churches wear hats, scarves and veils. I have no problem if it's additional.. But it cannot take the place of uncut hair. Furthermore the word "long" in Greek means uncut not long in the sense on length. So if a woman has uncut hair it is her glory to her.. Genetics plays a large role in length. God made us all differently so my hair may not be waist length but as long as it is uncut it's long in the eyes of God, it's your glory and it's given to you as a covering.
I don't agree with weaves and extensions because it creates an exception for black women in the church. The issue with our hair isn't that it doesn't grow. It's that most black women do not know how to properly care for their hair. As a result we have been labeled as having short hair. However in most cases it is due to damage, and an overall sense of being uniformed and miseducation regarding our hair. We would find it almost ludicrous to see a White or Hispanic Pentecostal add a weave to her hair. So why would we be able to do it? You see the hypocrisy in it?
From a social standpoint:
How many times have we heard..."I just want to go with whats popular right now. There's nothing wrong with doing my hair up in a weave just for a different look." Sure, for most women that isn't a problem. However, if you are a part of the church of the living God, that is a problem. Who do you want to look like? Furthermore, where are you getting your ideas from?
I get it that some of us that are new to Pentecost or even some who are not so new and have damaged hair struggle with the length....
Where did you get the idea to add hair? From the church? From the world?
Who told you or made you feel that your hair wasn't good enough?
Who told you or made you feel that your hair isn't pretty unless it has length?
Who told you or made you feel like you are inferior because of the length of your hair?
When I first came into the church, I struggled with the length of my hair because it was so short. I felt inferior because I didn't have long hair length wise like so many of my friends. I prayed and asked God to show me how He sees me.. Since that prayer, I have had many dreams about seeing myself in prayer with long, flowing hair- and it was beautiful because that's how God sees me with uncut hair.That is how God sees you.
We get so caught up on how everyone else sees us... But what ever happened to being pleasing to God? What about what He thinks? Isn't that what really matters?...
Dig deep and think about what drives a person to add hair to theirs.. When I used to wear a weave, I did it because I wanted to appear to be something that I wasn't. I had no problem telling people it wasn't my real hair if they asked.. But the objective was to have long, flowing hair that wasn't mine.
We believe in being who you are. Being who God created you to be. We hear all the time that we need to love ourselves. Yet when I go to conferences I constantly see black women with weaves (I know other ethnicities may wear them too but I am specifically addressing black women)... The reason is because there is an insecurity in their hearts.
The only reason you change things about yourself is because you are not comfortable and secure with yourself. If you feel you are overweight, you are going to do your best to eat better and exercise to change that. If you feel that your clothes are too tight, you are going to buy some that fit better. If you hair is too short length wise, you are going to add hair...? Why? Because you are not comfortable with the length, color, texture, whatever it may be. But you see the issue. The issue isn't that weaves are SO horrible- it is the motive behind it.
How will you ever learn to love yourself if you cannot truly appreciate YOU for YOU?
How will you ever learn to love yourself if you cannot truly appreciate YOU for YOU?
Stay tuned... this is a whole series! Posts to follow:
- Part II: Weaves and Extensions in Pentecost from the perspective of other natural Apostolics
- Part III: Weaves and Extensions in Pentecost from the perspective of other Apostolic women from the outside looking in
- Part IV: Weaves and Extensions in Pentecost from the perspective of other Apostolic men from the outside looking in
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